Trying to find myself again.


It looks like somewhere in the past year or so I’ve lost contact with myself. In between the grind of working, school and just adulting in general, I’ve stopped doing the things I love to do. My make up and clothes collection has gone untouched, I stay inside all day and have stopped using social media completely. I don’t read or even I don’t even window shop anymore. I’ve also stopped blogging.

While none of these are really bad things, as they are not hurting anyone really. I like doing those things, I’ve never been the type to go out in public in sweats and my hair not brushed. I hate to be sloppy, but it’s someone I have become. I came to this realization a couple of weeks ago, when I realized I gained a whole bunch of weight and that my closet full of pretty clothes and shoes have gone untouched. I looked in the mirror and realized that the person in front of was unrecognizable and not who I want to be.

It’s no one’s fault but my own and I am the only one who can fix it.

So slowly I’ve been setting aside time to make sure I start doing the things I love again. Like, applying a touch of mascara in the morning or taking some time before bed to catch up on reading.

Honestly I can feel myself slowly coming back. Hopefully this means that blogging regularly will start being a thing but we will see. In the meantime I just have to patient.

Getting back in the blogging Rhythm.

Hey Everyone,

I’ve been gone for a while, not because I wanted to trust me. There were just some real-life issues that got in the way. One was that my depression had hit an all-time low causing me to lack the energy to do anything, much less get up in the morning. My medication is really helping me out so I got that under control now. Also, school was just really breaking my back this semester, I feel like I have so much homework and exams I just can’t focus. Plus I kinda get test stressed and well it freaks me out.

Another huge thing is that we are currently trying to buy a house. Anyone who has ever done this will know exactly how much time (and stress!) goes into this. We put an offer on a house and hopefully we will have it by the 31st! I am seriously so excited (and scared). If everything goes smoothly I’ll hopefully be posting pictures soon! I have such big plans and I really can’t wait to share with you all!

One thing that I am doing to sort of help me get back in the blogging rhythm is I made a Beauty Instagram! It’s a lot easier for me to post pictures than plan update and write a blog. Doing this though has re-established my love for beauty and I think I’ve sort of stepped away from that and well I need to start getting back on that.

I am still debating if I want to add fashion to this or not. What do you all think?

My Morning routine

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Everyday I wake up to a tiny grey paw in my face..

This is Mordechai my grey tiger striped tabby cat. He is hungry and wants food now. I roll myself out of bed and get him a can of his digestive health wet food. Tesla then comes bolting out of the bedroom because ‘How dare mommy not pay her attention first’ she then, after scolding me, waits patiently by the back door to be let out for her morning bathroom break. After they are settled and fed I proceed to make myself a couple cups of coffee in our old school coffee maker.

Our Keurig decided to quit and walked out on me.

I have to be careful when making my coffee. I only allow myself two cups, since that one time I drank a whole pot and felt like I wanted to puke and simultaneously run a 5k without stopping. I then load two pieces of white bread into my toaster that is on it’s last leg. I have a feeling he’s going to join the Keurig soon. After I butter my toast and poor my coffee into my husband’s mug.

I am forbidden to use this mug but I continue to do so because I have my rebellious reasons, I may be 30 but I need my stubborn child side sometimes.

I then settle down to either do one of two things.; I read or type a blog post. This morning blogging won out as I have some motivation and I refuse to let that leave me. Since I’ve decided to write four blogs I need to make sure that take every opportunity presented to me. When this is done I browse Instagram for a while until I am ready to take my shower and dress.

Then it’s time to start running errands.

What do you do on the morning of your day off?

When your stomach sounds like The Creature from the Black Lagoon

Sunday was not a good day for me. Since decided to continue blogging and also getting a part time job, on top of going to school, I’ve decided Sundays and Tuesdays are the perfect days for me to take time out and plan blog posts.

The day started off really well, I had a nice breakfast, ran some of my errands and got home in time to make some lunch and settle down.

Until my stomach decided it speaks creature and it does so very loudly.

I’m about to get really personal with you all so if you don’t want to read it that’s fine, you can close now and be done with it.

I spent the entire night in the bathroom and had no idea my body could hold so much, when I thought it was over it just kept coming! This really pissed me off too since I had a 10 hour shift at work the next day and I was dying and dehydrated.

So forgive me for not keeping up my part of the bargain yet, but I will. Oh yes, I will.

Am I a Failed Blogger?

So in my tiny little corner of the internet I have been blogging for years. However I never really took my blogging seriously. I don’t look at stats, I stay away from comparing myself to other bloggers and I don’t even try to have a schedule. I blog when I please and just hope someone out there can read it and enjoy it.

Recently though, recently I’ve been looking more closely at my stats. I have been trying to write more engaging content. I still don’t have a schedule yet but it’s not for a lack of trying. I have been feeling envious because I can’t seem to break through. I didn’t even know I wanted to.

I want to give this blog my undivided attention. I want to meet other bloggers, attend events and partner with brands. I want to break out of my little corner and scream out my blog name to the world wide web. There’s a part of me however that keeps whispering, ‘Your too late’ , ‘Your not engaging or witty’ and ‘No one wants to read what your writing’. I can’t help but wonder if I should even continue trying.

There’s a side that wants to just start over, just delete all my content, rebrand and see if I can make it. A second side says that maybe I should just stop and count my losses. Spend my time in another way, stop trying. The third side wants to continue. The third side is rampaging not to give up, that how dare I even think about deleting years of work just because I am feeling a little insecure.

I feel like a freaking triangles in a world full of rolling circles.

I just want to roll!

Blogging 365; #49 Give a photo tour of a room in your house.

So I decided to use a couple of topics from from the 365 blog topic ideas, I mean I purchased the book I might as well use it.

So I used a random number generator to find out which topic I was going to do and I got Lucky number 49. Give a Photo Tour of a room in my house. Right now my house is kinda bare, I have not yet put any artwork up, or any shelves, and we don’t have to money to purchase some of the furniture we need.

I picked my living room as it is the most lived in room.

This is the room I typically do everything in. I blog, read, watch netflix, take naps and I cuddle with the hubby and pets in here. I love the large windows which I drink a cup of coffee or tea and I curl  up on those ugly (but comfy) red chairs and I read. I love this room, while I probably should have clean it a bit before posting these all online but I just don’t have the patience right now. I would like to put some pictures up and also a small table between the chairs once I have the money.

What’s the favorite room in your house?

2017 Blogging Goals

So it’s 2017 and I thought I would try out some blogging goals. Blogging goals I think tend to motivate bloggers to not only post but also interact and monitor their social media. It also gives bloggers a chance to get in touch with other bloggers and work with some companies.

While there are some numbers, I don’t actually want to focus on my blog being a numbers thing. If I look at the numbers I get stressed out, then I look at other bloggers and my ‘blogging confidence’ tends to take a nose dive. Instead I want to focus on creating better content and hopefully that will attract more followers and more engagement to my blog.

  • I want to follow at least 1 new blog a week

    While your thinking why only 1 blog, why not 5 or 10. Well the answer is that I start school next week and I am looking for a part time job. I won’t have the time to follow more blogs. Plus I want to be able to read that bloggers blog posts and to comment on that bloggers posts. If I follow 1 blog a week thats 52 blogs a year, which equals to a lot of blog reading. Plus I am already following quite a few bloggers at the moment so I do read their works

  • Comment on other posts more.

    While I do read lots of blog posts, I find myself not know what to reply with. leaving a ‘Great Blog Post’ seems kinda tacky and makes it seem like I didn’t read the post and just want that person to pay attention to me. This year I am going to try to engage more, not just on blog posts either but with Twitter and instagram too. Replying to what people say. maybe start up a conversation.

  • Get more Twitter, Instagram and Bloglovin Followers

    I think I’l have a goal of 700 twitter followers. I know that doesn’t seem like a lot to some people but it is to me. I won’t have a number goal for bloglovin or instagram yet, but still make sure to follow me. Also do please follow my Bookstagram and Book Blog.

  • Bring back some of my Favorite Post Series and create some new ones

    I loved doing Sample Sundays (especially since I have so many samples to use) it was really fun to do. Also I want to do more OOTD and Earring/ Jewelry OTD it gave me a chance to display what I have in my closet and to think more creatively. I am not sure what other series to create but I have some ideas.

  • Post about more Local shops and eateries.

    This will give me a chance to explore and step out of my comfort zone. Plus it gives people an Idea what Idaho is really about.

  • Work on my Blog Photography

    At my old place I didn’t have an area that I can set up my camera and have sunlight and be able to take quality pictures. Now I do and I intend to take full advantage. I’ll have to learn some some tricks and experiment but hopefully it can take my blog the step up it needs to gain attention.

Those are my goals for now it’s nothing I don’t think I can do. As long as I stay focused and dedicated and I think I can make it work and hopefully you guys can benefit with better content and engagement.

Do you have any blog goals or just life goals set?

I have a Book Blog

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I decided to Start a blogspot book blog. Partly because I read so many books and I don’t really think they belong here on my main site and also because I wanted to try out and see how Blogspot is compared to my wordpress.org blog. It’s called Nelms Tree Books so you know it’s me! Come and see HERE and tell me what you think?